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It's awards season in Hollywood as actors line up on the red carpet to give and receive prizes for films and TV shows you've never seen with glittering stars whose names you don't know.

If you are lucky, you may catch a glimpse of one of these bright young things on one of the late night talk shows, where we get to watch a clip to promote the film we are all supposed to flock to the next day. The clip (car crash, steamy kiss, car crash) may inspire you to grab the remote control, but that's about it.

Some of the films and series getting awards have so few viewers that the stars and directors, instead of thanking colleagues and family members, could save time by going door to door and thanking each audience member individually.

(Hint to America's film critics: This may be just an impression but the movie-going public may not be following your lead when it comes to entertainment choices. For example, I have seldom seen reviews as scathing as those for "Paul Blart: Mall Cop." The top rated movie in America for the past two weeks? "Paul Blart: Mall Cop." So, obviously, it's the audience who's wrong.)

But I think it would be much more fun if people in other professions got awards for their achievements on live TV where we could watch their expressions as their names are read off. BEST PEFORMANCE

BY A POLITICIAN IN

A SUPPORTING ROLE:

And the nominees are:

Caroline Kennedy - in spite of flubbing her lines, there's no substitute for the star power of a famous name.

John McCain - who's made more appearances on "Saturday Night Live" than Steve Martin.

Gov. Rod Blagojevich - hey, talk about stealing a scene (and he compares himself to Jimmy Stewart, Gary Cooper and Ghandi.)

And the award goes to:

Massachusetts State Sen. Sal DiMasi - the guy does know how to stage an exit.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY A CORPORATE ICON

IN A MELTDOWN:

And the nominees are:

Microsoft - which is claiming that its layoffs are just a small glitch and they'll be issuing a patch for that soon.

The Big Three automakers for an amazing entrance in Washington that made them almost as popular as the Pinto.

Bank of America and Merrill Lynch - whose merger has managed to make people look back on the collapse of Lehman Brothers as "the good old days."

And the award goes to: Bernard Madoff, who although a thief, is at least honest about it.

We could go on, but like all these award shows, we risk running into the 11 o'clock news, and some of you want to get to a late screening of "Mall Cop."

TOM REILLY is a Sun Chronicle news editor who thinks "WALL-E" should have been nominated as documentary. He can be reached at 508-236-0332 or at treilly@thesunchronicle.com. Read his blog at thesunchronicle.com/reilly.